2003-09-06 - 12:20 a.m.
My girls dumped me! Ooh, that's annoying. Beek, Cec and I were hanging out, having a girls' night, when the cell phone parade began. First it was Beek; she's been doing booty duty with an ex. Then Cec's new man called. Girls, don' you remember the pledge? To never ditch a friend for a guy? Hello, did no one else go through seventh grade in the Bangles era?
I gave up and headed home to watch Sex and The City and knit. Not exactly a lively evening. Good news, though; my instructor called, and there's room for me to start yoga lessons again starting the 18th. Yippee! The downer: my answering machine was down to 4 minutes of recording time, so I started deleting old messages. God. There were four, FOUR messages from J still on the machine, plus one from his cheat-partner. Yippee. Only not so much. I couldn't bring myself to delete them or listen; they're still there. Hell, I'm two muscle relaxants and a beer into the night; there's no way I'm dealing with old boyfriends! (Note that the relaxants are for a pinched sciatic nerve - I'm not abusing scrip drugs. Yet.)
Miranda: "Charlotte's not having a relationship. She's having multiple orgasms."
Jeebus, what IS wrong with me? The sex-obsession is back full-fledged. Sigh again. This is not good. My ego's still all fucked up and I do NOT feel attractive. A relationship ends, so you feel unwanted. How are you supposed to project confidence enough that someone else wants you? I'm serious here; if anybody's got advice, I'm open. I haven't been single in three and a half years. Help!
Comments: Speak your piece!
former / latter