2003-08-21

2003-08-21 - 3:56 p.m.

I lust for this dress!



It's sexy, but not slutty. Imagine walking into a crowded room during the holidays wearing this. From the front, it's the standard little black thingie. But from the back...oh yes. I fucking love it. I even have the perfect shoes! But sadly, the dress is not for me. My spinal fusion scar would ruin the whole look. Oh, sadness. Oh, disappointment!

In case you're wondering, yes, my libido is back. "Oh happy day, calloo, callay!"* And best of all, I have permission to roll around with strangers!

Okay, here's what really happened.

I've been feeling much better the past couple of days, for lots of reasons. For one thing, exercising almost two hours a day makes you sleep hard. For another, we're so slammed at work, there's no time to think about my lovelife debacle. Then came this morning and the appointment with Therapist. I told him everything that's been flooding my head - all the self-doubt, loathing, fear, anger...and he just looked at me. He asked for details about a specific thing. He looked at the floor. He looked at me again. Cleared his throat. And said,

I'm only telling you this once, so get it through your head right now. You are sexy. The problems you're having are not about you. Get out of your head. Be careful, be smart, but for god's sake go get laid!

I shit you not. There's no way I could make this stuff up. It's too funny. And ok, that's not the way most counselors talk to their clients, but we've known each other a long damned time now. We'll see what happens.

*Thank you, Lewis Carroll. Ya cousin-lovin', coke snortin' freak.

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